when i lose control, it drives me nuts.. and it reminds me of the million and one 'what if's.. what if.. eventually.. i didn't achieve what i gave up a lot of other stuff for.. what if..

if music was ever used to express phases of life, it fitted perfectly into mine..

just that it has been my msn nick for almost a week, so decided to just pen it into words on my blog.. but anyway, boon says that i'm living my life on facebook, which is not a good thing!! it's addiction..

so, music and me.. songs and me.. different times, different settings, but once in a while, the same song goes in circles and come back to me, or other new songs may pop up and surprise me.. but just that there are few songs which stood out at me during these times.. pardon me for liking the really old songs and seriously, if you read the sing lyrics, they would have absolutely no connection with what i was going through, but shoot me man, i just found that song and it just got stuck with me..

i remembered back in secondary school, i was obsessed with this japanese instrumental group known as SENS, which has really beautiful soothing music, blending piano with nature.. but it puts one to sleep.. i even went to the stage of getting hold of the music scores.. but then everything stopped there, when i moved on to junior college..

nothing exactly stayed during the years in acjc, except all the insane mass dance songs that we danced to.. flip fantasia, cantaloop etc.. and drops of jupiter became my seniors' nite theme..

subsequently, no songs or music groups actually drove me nuts over.. but there are just a few songs that stayed on, although the lyrics make absolutely no sense in terms of anything to me.. but it's just the situation the songs were 'found' and how much they have journeyed with me..

chayanne - yo te amo was one of the many songs in the taiwanese version of meteor garden 2 and it was played while the actors and actresses traveled through the beauty of barcelona.. and little did i know that 6 months after, i actually visited europe but not to barcelona.. this songs made its impression during the 3-hour train ride from freiburg to konstanz.. and we actually went through schwarzwald.. through the valleys and mountains.. it just made the song looked so perfect..

k-maro - femme like you was a really weird find.. it was 'found' coz my mp3 player so happened to be out of batt at that particular instant, so i ended up plugging into live radio on einslive.de.. and viola!! there was this song being played for that particular moment.. a totally irrelevant song, with pretty explicit expressions.. and what more, it's french, which i have absolutely no understanding of.. but this song sat me through the hours in my room during exchange.. when i had to do stupid reports etc.. and more so, it sat me through the train ride from hamburg to muenchen.. when i was waiting for the train at 5am in the cold, and through the ride of waking up occassionally to catch the white landscape passing beside me..

lifehouse - blind was a steal from keve's notebook.. once again, it had no relevant to anything but rather it sat me through the return train ride from muenchen to hamburg.. keeping me awake while having to umsteig 3 times through the night.. you must be wondering, why i did not just take the nachtzug.. but once in a while, when i do visit the song lyrics again, it just kind of remind me of my love-hate relationship with a place, location..

anyway, there are definitely stray songs that somehow made an impression somewhere.. pussycat dolls - don't cha or buttons.. madonna's cover of abba's hit.. xavier naidoo - dieser weg, which subsequently went on to become the german team's world cup theme song.. and there were plenty of others.. and how the world did i end up hearing these songs?? thanks to radek for blasting his radio in our not-so-big house..

it seemed that much of the music which i have heard of, came during my time on exchange.. but then again, blame me for not having a radio in my room.. it's true.. it 'blew' up in sec. 4 and after that, i no longer have a radio..

perhaps through this, it's possible to read me, know my thoughts etc.. but music kind of walked us through life.. well, of course there are nonsense music around too.. but sometimes they may serve as therapy, theme songs to life moments etc.. so admit it, music is part of our lives..

and so i declare this in public!! =) and admit it, bruce springsteen - secret garden is an evergreen..

many wonderful moments & a woe..

it was a great and lazy saturday.. well, at least for me.. considering the hour which i woke up at and the blowing up of all other plans into pieces.. it was truly lazy and.. LAZY!! BUT i was there.. i made it to denise's place for potluck!!! =)


this photo was taken during the project bbq session at east coast park some time in july.. there's sharon, michelle, denise, fanny & boquan.. jeffrey was in the other photo taken at raffles marina, but i left that photo on my desktop at work.. so anyway, here makes up the lunch party at work!! coz we have only that much chinese folks around..

anyway, our potluck session at denise's place finally materialised this weekend!!! michelle & keith cooked us bolognese spaghetti.. denise made awesome curry chicken.. boquan & xiulan got us sambal sting-ray & fried chicken wings.. fanny deep-fried smiley potatoes & chicken nuggets.. jeffrey cooked up a storm of pineapple rice.. and me?? mum made mango pudding on my behalf.. coz it's a well-known fact that if i do attempt to cook, either the kitchen will end up in flames or everyone will need to consume charcoal pills to put a stop to diarrhoea...

and what's better?? we got to play mahjong.. and my aim for today, was to learn how to play mahjong.. well, i'll learn about how to win the game (with more money) another time.. my teacher was none other than denise.. while jeffrey & keith served as part-time teachers.. =) one commenting note was how jeffrey somehow never won a single round.. which got him into the state of playing-mahjong-while-trying-to-cut-and-cook-pineapple-rice.. let's all give a hand to the expert here.. psst.. i can see jeffrey armed with a parang and gonna come after me for writing all that down.. but anyway, it's mahjong.. it's all about luck and.. luck.. but hey, everything was done in the name of fun!! =)

we had too much food but we told ourselves that we would not resort to having to play some silly game to clear up the food.. however, we did have the silly idea of using them as rewards for anyone who won any round.. erm.. and then mahjong would become the hardest game around to play.. coz somehow nobody would like to win the game anymore.. hahaha..

thanks for all the fun everyone!! i really love my colleagues.. =)

but to mention a woe, it will be as follows.. a non-work relevant email was received one afternoon, which ended with a moral stating that in any situation, do not neglect any changes, for one never knows when that change may affect himself and others ard as well.. and as such, we were just discussing that PAN 89 should be reissued, with corrected consumptions.. otherwise, many will be greatly affected..

on a side-note: keve is back!!! my gummibears & ritter sport chocolates came home as well!! well, that should not be the main point.. but just glad to see keve after a period of almost 2 years?? yeah, so welcome back.. but that stupid friend will be gone on the coming friday again.. so go back and study hard!! =)